Growing up


A bit of History, I was bullied quite a lot as a child and come from a fairly impoverished background,though I was not aware of it at the time. I am also dyslexic, though I have managed to get around this most of the time thanks to the wonders of spell checking, and not to hot on the maths side of things.
So I am mostly self taught and there are very large gaps in my education.

I used to enjoy playing with the girls in my infants school and I did win a prize for embroidering a picture of a Peacock, but I was physically bullied quite a lot and was school phobic and so went to a see a “Child psychiatrist” from the age of about the age of 7 till I was about 14 or so, this to be honest did not seem to help at all with anything.moody picture !!! Once I had moved to a Comprehensive School I was constantly taunted and told I was Queer and jumped on beaten up and had my launch money stolen on a daily basis, though it did not appear to me that I was any different to any one else at the time I was singled out for targeting.
At that time (1971 approx.) you could of course get away with long hair, cheese cloth shirts and all the rest of it, so I did not look very masculine by the time I was about 16, though at the time I had done the usual closet raiding at home, having two sisters who's clothes I would on occasion borrow whilst they were out. There was a girl who I got very close to but though I found her very attractive I often wondered what it would be like to be her and I used to go and visit when she was baby sitting and we would talk and I would try on her bangles and jewellery which did not look to bad with the long hair velvet flares and so forth.

I never had any relationships with women until I was 28 years old, a bit of a late starter I think.
I did get very lonely and suffered from depression which is something I still have to fight with now though I do not think it is a gender related thing.



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